Posted by nightphoenix on Sep 1, 2010 in
Creative,
Novels,
Visual arts,
Writing I’ve observed something about myself. I do my best writing when I write for myself, but I do my best art when it’s for other people.
Not that I don’t want other people to read my writing…I do. Eventually. And it’s not that I don’t have readers in mind while I write. I’m always thinking, “Okay, is this going to interest anyone other than me?” and “This is going to bore people” and things like that. But ultimately I write these stories because I want to see them on paper. I suppose I’m writing the sort of book I’d like to read. Even if everyone else thinks the book stinks, I’ll still want to read it. Bit narcissistic, I guess. My point is, I’m not really doing this FOR anyone else. I want people to be interested, but I’m not going to write stories just to please them.
Now art, on the other hand, is a whole different thing with me. And when I say “my art”, let me clarify that I’m talking about the art I do that doesn’t have anything to do with what I’m writing. If I’m drawing book stuff, I’m still technically in writer mode. Other than story-related pieces, I really don’t make art for myself. I’m not one to make stuff that I’d hang on the wall…unless I was creating the piece specifically TO hang on the wall. I think my wands even fall into this category. I like making them, but I’m not so much making them for me as I am making them for Someone Else.
And when I do make art for a specific purpose, or for a specific person, I work much faster. What would probably take me a week doing it for myself, I can create in a day for someone else. The whole process just becomes easier. I don’t know why that is…I’ve only recently observed THAT it is, for me. I don’t do art for its own sake. I don’t just draw because I “feel” like it. I have to have a purpose in mind.
And on the other hand, when I try to write something for someone else? The process bogs down. I hate writing essays, for instance, and how-to’s. Even if it’s a subject that interests me, it’s just never as satisfying as working on my novel. Have anyone else noticed that book and movie reviews on this blog are few and far between? I don’t enjoy writing them. Because it’s the sort of writing one does more for other people than for yourself (after all, you’ve read the book or seen the movie…you don’t have to tell yourself what you thought about it). It’s difficult, and the result is not satisfying. I have to write for its own sake; trying to squeeze an objective in there is hard.
So I have two creative outlets which I enjoy and am fairly skilled at: writing and visual art. My writing belongs to me. My art belongs to the world, I guess. I wonder if I was always like this, or if choosing to pursue writing over art caused my brain to wire itself this way. If I’d chosen to concentrate on art instead, would it be the other way around?
Has anyone else with multiple creative interests noticed something like this about themselves?
Tags: artwork, business of writing, the real world
Posted by nightphoenix on Aug 15, 2010 in
Writing I was thinking about this yesterday, but I thought I’d wait and give myself a little time to process. Yesterday I attended a funeral for a friend of mine who lost a child. I can’t really describe what that was like, only that it’s something that nobody should ever have to go through. Two things in particular struck me.
One, our culture really doesn’t allow people to grieve in public. Nobody wants to watch people get emotional; it makes everyone else uncomfortable. But I was struck, yesterday, by how much unnecessary pressure this puts on people. It’s a whole lot harder to hold back grief than it is to let it out, and I would imagine it’s not healthy to hold back. Yet this is what our society demands of us. Makes me appreciate certain Middle Eastern cultures, where weeping and wailing in public is accepted and in fact, expected. I mean, when they grieve, they go all out. They cry out, and beat the ground, and tear their clothes, and cut their hair. It seems over the top until you’ve actually experienced grief like that…then you understand how freeing such actions are.
Two, I can never know for certain what it’s like to experience something without actually experiencing it for myself. I know that I as a writer…and maybe a lot of fiction writers do this…will find myself thinking that I’m more in tune with how people think and how people really feel than they are themselves. It’s an arrogant state of mind, and yesterday I was confronted by what utter bullshit it is. I can’t fully imagine that kind of grief because I haven’t been through the circumstances. It was potent enough being on the fringes of it…actually experiencing it? I can’t imagine. It’s a humbling thing for me as a writer to have to admit.
My job is to put myself in my characters’ shoes, but sometimes I do need to step back and admit that sometimes I don’t know what a particular feeling or thought or event is really like. I certainly don’t have the right to assume that because I habitually put myself in other people’s shoes, that I possess a surer grasp of an emotion than someone who’s actually gone through it. I’m good at guessing and mimicking how people think, and of course I know how I think. But I was struck yesterday by how much of what I know about people is simply outside observation, and not internal knowledge.
The only person I can ever truly know is myself.
Tags: the real world
Posted by nightphoenix on Jul 27, 2010 in
News Did some tweaking to the Writing Projects page last night. Updated the Shades, Dragon Singer, and Waters blurbs to reflect more up-to-date ideas on where they are going. Added a spot for Sielu’syoja: The Soul Eaters…need to come up with a theme song. I also intend to add a spot for Raethe and Eolissa’s story (which needs a working title and a song).
However, in the midst of updating, I discovered the my song links weren’t working. I must have updated something which broke the wpaudio plugin I’ve been using. I tried to get it working last night, but alas, no luck. I’m just not code-savvy enough to really know what I’m doing, and unfortunately the site for the plugin is only so helpful if you don’t know what’s wrong. So, just letting everyone know that for the time being, music on the blog doesn’t work. If I have to, I’ll switch to a different plugin.
Meanwhile, keep watching the Projects page. I’ve also added a few more links to the right side, and am about to organize them a little better.
*Update* Music works! Yay for support forums.
Tags: the real world
Posted by nightphoenix on Jul 26, 2010 in
News Hey, let’s see how this works.
Now, if you like a post I make, you can give it a high five at the bottom.
P.S. And if you have a user on the blog and are signed in, it should list your username. Otherwise, it will list you as anonymous.
Tags: the real world
Posted by Mistress of Feathers on Jul 25, 2010 in
News So I finally found a resource with a massive list of known forum spammers, and went through my user list checking every email address. Wouldn’t you know it, most of them were on that list.
I’ve now gone through and deleted probably 3/4 of my user list. I left the ones whose emails didn’t come up on the spammer list, which I am assuming/hoping belong to actual people. (People that I don’t know in RL, that is. There were exactly five of you. Yay!) Again, if you’re human and somehow ended up being deleted, please email me and I can set you back up.
And please feel free to comment on the blog, if you like something/ don’t like something I say! I like feedback.
Tags: the real world
Posted by nightphoenix on Jul 13, 2010 in
Writing Well, as it happens, I’ve gotten myself roped into helping out with our church’s vacation bible school this week. I’m in charge of upper elementary crafts, ha. The theme is High Seas Adventure, which is kind of fun for me because I’ve actually been sailing on a schooner. However, it is a bit awkward for me because I’m not a Christian, and this is a very Christian sort of event. It’s not that I don’t like or don’t agree with what’s being taught, because for the most part I do. It’s more like I feel like I’m not the person that ought to be teaching it, you know? Luckily, the other gal I’m working with is doing the talking part, and she’s very, very good…so it’s not so bad.
Today’s motto was God’s Word is True. Now, when I read a phrase like that, my hackles automatically go up because it’s so easy for people to misunderstand. Not all truth is factual truth, and a story doesn’t have to be historically, factually real in order to be “true”. However, these are kids we’re talking about. How do you explain the concept of genres in the Bible to a fourth grader? Simple answer: you really can’t. Wait until they get into junior high, and then maybe you can start explaining how the various parts of Scripture are true.
Read more…
Tags: rant, the real world
Posted by nightphoenix on Jun 26, 2010 in
Creative Last weekend, the hubby and I took Eli to see Toy Story 3 with my mom…and later that night, we saw The Karate Kid (minus Eli and my mom!).
Toy Story 3 was good, but surprisingly…well, dark. I mean, some of stuff those toys were doing, some of the scenes, whew. Just the fact that these are children’s toys makes it all the more disturbing when they imprison and hurt each other, you know? It reminded me of one of the interesting aspects of faery lore: the grotesque is hidden within the enchanting and innocent. Everything seems fine and beautiful, but there’s something…off…that you just can’t put your finger on. Until it’s too late.
But they wrapped up the Toy Story saga quite well. Yes, I cried.
The Karate Kid was a different beast altogether.
Read more…
Tags: business of writing, movies, Reviews, the real world
Posted by nightphoenix on May 9, 2010 in
News,
Writing So I went to see Holly Black and Cassandra Claire at a little book signing in Vero Beach last Friday. (Good thing I do check LJ every so often, or I might not have known about it). Vero’s only about an hour drive from where we live, so it was really great that they came that close.
Both of them read selections from their new books (Cassandra’s isn’t out yet, Black’s is), and then they did a Q&A. Some of the questions were more interesting than others…heh heh. Kind of makes me think about how they must have to answer the same questions over and over again, and that if my books gain enough of a following that I get to do a tour, how I’d have to do the same thing. Although, having people that interested in what I write would be awesome, in the long run.
I took my stele along, of course, being the ridiculous fan girl that I am. While I was there, I decided to give it to Cassandra Claire, since hey, she invented them, right? She said no one had ever given her one before, so that was kind of neat. I gave her a business card, too.
Let’s see, what else. I ran into a gal I had met at the writer’s conference, and we got to catch up. She’s a fellow fan of Susan Hubbard, and we seem to like the same sorts of books and movies. I had a lot of fun with her at the conference, so it was good to see her again.
But I think the crowning moment of the night was the earth-shattering burp that emanated from the balcony about halfway through the Q&A. Seriously, even the two authors paused long enough to acknowledge it.
Yeah, that was Eli.
Now, I don’t know what’s worse: the fact that my four-year-old son managed to belch loud enough for the entire building to hear…or the fact that I recognized his burp. I remember turning to M and saying “That sounded an awful lot like my son…”
Yeah…the hubby confirmed it later.
Tags: authors, books, the real world
Posted by nightphoenix on Apr 11, 2010 in
Creative,
Daily,
Novels,
Writing I have been feeling inordinately uninspired lately. Working on Shades feels like slogging through mud. In fact, anything that requires me to be creative feels like slogging through mud. Next week will be a little busy, as I’ll be preparing for next weekend.
Read more…
Tags: process, Shades, the real world, worldbuilding
Posted by nightphoenix on Feb 1, 2010 in
News But I saw this last night and it made me very, very happy. Remember those Westboro, “God Hates -X-” nutcases that go around picketing soldier funerals? This is the best counterprotest I’ve ever seen.
When you compare statements like “God Hates Fags” and “Where’s Waldo?”, yeah, there really isn’t much meaning to either, and I think that was the point. It’s really an ingenious protest, IMO.
Here’s the article itself.
Tags: humor, snark, the real world
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